WTF is Sologamy? Why marry yourself? Sologamy; a commitment to self-love (Photo: Vasily Koloda @Unsplash)
Sologamy is defined as marrying oneself, A new concept to our ears; we are gobsmacked to find that this concept exists!
Sologamy is the act of marrying oneself, a commitment to choose one’s happiness, and self-care as the primary objective in life. The term was coined in 2003 by Jessica Monighan and gained more attention when fashion designer Yuki Yoshihara chose to marry herself in 2009.
Sologamy is the act of marrying oneself, a commitment to choose one’s happiness, and self-care as the primary objective in life.
By loving yourself first, you become better equipped to form meaningful connections without feeling as if your needs must be put aside or compromised.
(Photo: Victoria Priessnitz @Unsplash)
This controversial ritual is a rare occurrence gaining more popularity as the need for sustainable self-love becomes a non-negotiable. And frankly, rightfully so, with more people recognizing the need for self-care and self-love in an increasingly competitive and chaotic world. By loving yourself first, you become better equipped to form meaningful connections without feeling as if your needs must be put aside or compromised.
In many ways, sologamy is an act of radical self-love and acceptance.
The reasons for someone to choose sologamy vary. For some, it is a commitment to remain single and independent. For others, it may be an expression of self-love or a way to celebrate accomplishments.
More popular among women, sologamy is a ceremonial statement of one’s commitment to love one’s self before all others. Like the proverbial airplane analogy – where passengers are advised to give themselves the oxygen mask first before helping others; sologamy, in its most idealistic ideology, is the promise to look after yourself; otherwise, you can not adequately help others.
It is important to note that sologamy does not preclude someone from having a relationship with another person in the future. Sologamy is about making a conscious decision to prioritize oneself first and honor that commitment over any other relationships one can have with others.
The idea behind sologamy is that once a person has married themselves, they are free to explore relationships with others without feeling guilty or obligated to prioritize anyone else’s needs over their own. Like a traditional marriage ceremony, there is clarity among family and friends about where the intended commitment lies.
So, even if someone chooses to marry themselves first, it does not mean they will never be able to have a successful marriage with a partner. Instead, it is an opportunity for them to practice self-care and build meaningful relationships with others from a place of security and autonomy creating secure attachment-style connections.
Why marry yourself? (Photo: Taylor Heery @unsplash)
-Surround yourself with positive affirmations. Post reminders of your worth in places you’ll often see, like your car or bathroom mirror.
Include phrases such as “I am enough” or “My happiness is a priority.”
Sologamy is a growing trend, and self-love is a real need. Many young people today find romantic relationships challenging due to social media, cultural pressures, and the need for independence. It is becoming increasingly common for individuals to recognize that a successful relationship starts with one’s own needs being met. This understanding has been further reinforced by the rise of technology, enabling people to create meaningful connections while still investing in personal growth.
The Benefits of Sologamy. Why marry yourself?
Sologamy offers many benefits for those who choose to practice it.
- Free from judgment. It allows individuals to prioritize their needs and will enable them to focus on their personal growth without feeling the need to compromise or be taken for granted by a partner.
- It mentally prepares others not to have expectations around being prioritized first as an official ceremony witnessed by friends and family. Sologamy conveys to anyone that the focus starts with the celebrant first.
- Encourages individuals to develop healthier relationships with themselves, which can lead to more meaningful relationships with others—a symbolic gesture of self-love.
- Promotes a greater sense of independence and grounding. By embracing sologamy, individuals can learn to build a life they are proud of and break free from the stigma surrounding being single. This increased autonomy allows individuals to explore their interests and passions without fear or judgment and feel a sense of pride.
- We have improved mental health. Creating a statement of self-love can lead to increased self-esteem and greater satisfaction in all areas of life. Sologamy also enables us to celebrate our uniqueness and take ownership of ourselves without conforming to society’s expectations. Through this practice, individuals can learn to appreciate themselves while acknowledging the importance of forming meaningful relationships.
- Confidence. Studies have found that it can lead to increased self-confidence, improved communication skills, greater emotional stability, and even better relationships.
- A sense of personal identity and to define a relationship with themselves that is separate from any other relationships. It can also help individuals become more accepting and comfortable with their flaws, as well as help them identify areas for improvement.
Self-marriage reminds us to put ourselves first and never underestimate our worth. Whenever we remember to take the time to love and nurture ourselves first, we will be better equipped to open up our hearts to others. Sologamy is a powerful tool that can help us foster healthier relationships with ourselves and those around us. It’s a commitment to being our best friend, no matter what life brings. A reminder that we are enough, just as we are.
Self-marriage reminds us to put ourselves first and never underestimate our worth.
Whenever we remember to take the time to love and nurture ourselves first, we will be better equipped to open up our hearts to others.
(Photo: Everton Vila @Unsplash)
Sologamy is a powerful tool that can help us foster healthier relationships with ourselves and those around us. It’s a commitment to being our best friend, no matter what life brings. A reminder that we are enough, just as we are.
How to Practice Sologamy
Practicing sologamy is easier than it sounds. It can be straightforward. Here are a few ideas to get started:
-Set aside time each day for self-reflection and gratitude. Taking just a few minutes daily to focus on what you appreciate about yourself and your life can help increase your sense of contentment and self-worth.
-Surround yourself with positive affirmations. Post reminders of your worth in places you’ll often see, like your car or bathroom mirror. Include phrases such as “I am enough” or “My happiness is a priority.”
-Be mindful of your self-talk. Keep your attitude positive and release any negative, critical options of yourself and others. Practice using your vocabulary and only tactful, loving words. In time this practice will become natural and reset your internal narrative.
-Treat yourself to something special every once in a while. It could be a spa day, a fancy dinner, or a night in with your favorite movie. Taking time to focus on yourself is pivotal to increasing self-love and enhancing your relationships with others.
-Engage in activities that make you feel alive. Pursuing hobbies, interests, and passions can help us reconnect with our true selves and remember what makes us unique.
Practicing sologamy can help you develop a deep, lasting relationship with yourself. It’s an opportunity to re-discover yourself and find inner peace and fulfillment. Dedication and patience can be the key to unlocking your happiest, most authentic self. Try it and see what happens! You may be surprised by how powerful it can be.
(Photo: Victoria Priessnitz @Unsplash)
Sologamy is a fascinating concept that is gaining traction in modern society.
It’s an opportunity to build a strong, loving relationship with ourselves and enjoy the joys of being in a committed partnership – even if we are the only ones in it.
By focusing on self-reflection, gratitude, positive affirmations, engaging in activities that make us feel alive, and treating ourselves to unique experiences, we can unlock the power of sologamy and learn to love ourselves unconditionally. With time and dedication, this powerful practice can help us find true peace and fulfillment from within.
No matter the reason, the underlying foundation of sologamy remains the same: choosing oneself first to build a more meaningful and fulfilling life. Especially in keeping with today’s mental health awareness challenged by everyday global stressors, this ritual is a profoundly personal statement dressed in the excitement of a celebration of self.
Ultimately, self-marriage encourages an attitude of love and respect towards oneself. It can be a powerful tool for finding inner peace and true happiness and a source of inspiration in our daily lives.
Sologamy is a powerful tool that can help us foster healthier relationships with ourselves and those around us. (Photo: Eduardo Barrios @unsplash)
I’ve never heard about this concept before, it’s a super interesting read!
I’ve never heard of this specific concept before but think it’s wonderful that there is such a well-defined concept around self-love and acceptance.
I was not aware of the term ‘sologamy.’ I will take a moment to explore your blog further and learn more.