Our top 3 Communication Hacks Will Save Your Relationships

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We reveal the top 3 communication hacks you never even heard of! We have collected some insights from experts that would transform your relationships and change how you communicate. Do you ever need help to make people understand your message or feel you need to be heard? Read on.

Communication is a crucial skill to have in life. No matter the situation, effectively communicating your thoughts and ideas is essential for getting along. That said, it’s frustrating to ensure your message gets across clearly. So please take a deep breath, gather your thoughts, take your time, and remember some of our communication hacks in this article. (Photos: SlLGhin @sustainablysingle.com)

• Communication goes beyond the words we use.
• Land that message
• 1. Qualify where you are
• 2. Flip the Script: Why ‘No’ is the New ‘Yes’ in Communication
• 3. Be present

Communication goes beyond the words we use.

It’s not just about what you say but how and when you say it. As intelligent beings, we naturally pick up on vibes and whether or not we trust what someone is saying. Sometimes, our outward expression doesn’t match what’s going on inside. Most of the time, we don’t even realize what triggers our emotions or responses. And we certainly can’t control what sets off others.

It’s essential to pay attention to someone’s words and tone, especially when they seem stressed. If they’re talking fast and high-pitched, try slowing down your speech, talking lower, and adding some pauses. This can bring some calm and positive energy to the conversation.

The goal is to identify what your counterparts actually need (monetarily, emotionally, or otherwise) and get them feeling safe enough to talk and talk and talk some more about what they want.

chris voss

It might be tricky, and let’s face it – it can be WORK, but getting your message to stick and be heard is possible. With patience and understanding — plus these three clever communication hacks — you’ll uplift and take your communication to the next level. And if it doesn’t work, it may be a catalyst for change. We must take ownership of our attitudes and behaviors to succeed in communication.

Land that message

Communication can be challenging; it’s ongoing progress. Remember you are creating a safe emotional space and holding it for someone else to express. It does require patience and self-restraint at times. But like anything else, practice makes perfect. Plus, it can be a fantastic learning vehicle to learn about yourself, how you respond, and what triggers you. And sometimes, you may not be up for working on it. You gotta know how to “land” that message. Sometimes, it feels like nothing gets through, no matter how hard you try.

Yep, there will be those frustrating moments where you’ve done all you can, and nothing registers. Don’t worry – we’ll dive deeper into that in another article. For now, let’s focus on mastering the art of effective communication. Communication tips are abundant; don’t worry about all the strategies. We’ve got the three best communication hacks you need for any situation.

1. Quantify where you are

Have you ever heard of the phrase “quantify where you are”? It’s a concept from Brene Brown, known for her vulnerability and courage expertise.

In a recent interview about relationships, Brown shared a personal strategy she and her partner use: they quantify their energy levels. For instance, if Brown comes home and says, “I’m at 10% right now,” it’s her way of saying she’s feeling low on energy, patience, and kindness. Her partner may volunteer to step in and say, ‘ I got you.’

This may look like taking care of expectations and responsibilities that can tax energy even further. Being extra mindful and rescheduling social engagements, farming out cooking and cleaning tasks, etc. They are doing what is possible to reset. This communication style is partnership teamwork with support, knowing not to take anything personally.

2. Flip the Script: Why ‘No’ is the New ‘Yes’ in Communication

It may seem counter-intuitive, but former FBI negotiator Chris Voss advises getting the other person to say ‘no’ as a powerful tool for effective communication. Although he uses this method as a negotiation technique, we can not ignore the value learned here. Chris Voss believes that getting the other person to say ‘no’ is an empathetic way of engaging because saying ‘no’ makes a person feel protected, safe, and empowered.

The benefits are twofold: You get a better response by letting the other person feel in charge and create a positive outcome by framing the situation so they can feel good about offering support. So why not flip the script by trying to get a ‘no’ instead of a ‘yes’. Research shows that people feel good about helping others.

In the School of Greatness interview between Lewis Howes and Chris Voss, Chris also recommends paraphrasing to keep the conversation engaged and give more clarity. Lewis Howes adds that you become more enjoyable when genuinely interested in the other person.

Another quality is shared in Dale Carnagie’s legendary book (Warren Buffet’s favorite) – How to win friends and influence people.

3. Be present

Let’s talk about the 3rd communication tip, which isn’t a “hack” but more of a point of view (POV).

Before you deliver any information, knowing if the person you’re talking to can even comprehend it is essential. You can do this by being compassionate and accepting who that person is showing up to be. Then consider if what you want to say is

1. Is it necessary? Do you need to say it? 

2. Is it kind? In today’s turbulent world, kindness is more important than ever.

3. and whom does it serve? Asking the tricky question, is your ego have any part in this conversation? 

Filtering your words through these questions can help you decide if it’s worth saying or editing how it’s being said. 

Marianne Williamson, the best-selling author, spiritual leader, and politician, believes that true fulfillment comes from understanding ourselves through the people we interact with. Rather than expecting others to make us happy and placing the onus on fulfilling our needs. We should accept and appreciate them for who they are and be present.

By focusing on the present and not getting caught up in the past or future narratives, our communication becomes unbiased, more meaningful, and purposeful. Good communication is the backbone of a successful relationship.

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